Anti-Green Tip #4: Plastic Bags

I don't know about you, but I'm sick of hearing, "Paper or plastic?" at the grocery store. No matter what you answer, it's wrong. The right answer is, "Neither: I have my own reusable bag." If you don't bring your own bag, the bagger stares you down and tries to make you feel all guilty. Well guess what? I feel no guilt, people, and neither should you. The right answer, in my book, is a resounding "plastic!" You wanna know why? Resources are used to make all kinds of bags, whether they're paper or the reusable kind, which are probably manufactured in China anyway by poor child laborers before being shipped across the ocean on big freights that consume a bunch of oil. So you might as well choose plastic -- you know you want to -- and then throw the bag away when you're done so some goose can use it to make a nest.